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his poison heart

by Voran

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1.
Once I was young and I thought it worked like this: a white light A leaping bright charge Dancers of Zeus whirl from wire to wire Under red-gold noon, under red-gold noon His fingers sent charges down to the spine Under blazing sun, under blazing sun His hot metal mouth tasted sweeter than wine Once I was foolish, I thought it worked like this, a bright fire Purple sky vortexing, all the Lord’s earth caught and tossed in the gyre Under roiling storm, under roiling storm His silver tongue danced slowly on mine High above the moor, high above the moor His fingers laced through mine to entwine Hear My words He said We are not Heat and light You are wound I am knife Deep in cavern's mouth, deep in cavern's mouth He asked me to drink from the banks of the Styx Far below the ground, far below the ground He said, if you loved me, you'd drink Death's dark milk
2.
He says if you loved me You'd do this just for me To sate the rage that grows in my poison heart He says if you want me You'll crawl through the mines with me Walk through the places that call to my poison heart He beckons me to the banks of the roiling Styx He asks of me that I drink the black treacherous water He says if you loved me You'd lay face down for me Give in to the violence inside my poison heart He says if you need me You'll bleed red blood for me You'll spill bright nectar that feeds my poison heart He beckons me to the banks of the roiling Styx He asks of me that I drink the black treacherous water
3.
You tell me you love how my neck curves thin and fine You tell me you want to brush my black hair to one side and kiss it to death (A great betrayal) You've said too much You didn't mean any of this You tell me you love the grey-black earth of my eyes You tell me you want to look into them while our wild hips collide (A great betrayal) You've said too much You didn't mean any of this (A great betrayal) (A knife to the aorta) You've said too much You didn't mean any of this You can't replace the blood spilled to earth by your lies Your vicious knives found the place where the vessels divide
4.
Hush Don't go outside Don't move - they will hear the scraping of gravel They wait in the louring shadows Vicious creatures with fell talons and teeth Don't go to the window Don't speak out loud They're waiting outside And if I am taken Know that I have always loved you Hush Walk the knife's edge Keep your finger alert on the trigger Tread softly on tight coiled tiptoe One by one, left, right, be weightless Don't go to the window Don't speak out loud They're waiting outside And if I am taken Know that I have always loved you
5.
His eyes met mine across the black and white tiles How do I navigate these many-headed vicious intrigues? He said I'd swim across the ocean for you Rooks poised high on the seventh rank Fazed by the harsh white lights I blunder The white queen swooped low and threatened to pierce my defenses I moved a black knight high and took her, I thought I was wise He said I'd swim across the ocean for you Rooks poised high on the seventh rank Fazed by the harsh white lights I blunder He said I'd swim across the ocean for you I didn't mean to make him think we were joined by such binds Rooks poised high on the seventh rank Fazed by the harsh white lights I blunder Rooks poised high on the seventh rank Fazed by the harsh white lights I blunder
6.
Lithe and agile I spin these steel silk ropes Viscous air not quite rain It's night And I cannot return his honeyed words You don't understand These eight limbs of mine You don't understand These eight pitch black eyes I can't say I love you I hunt I hunger I feed Raindrops jewel my web Poised ready He writhes trapped I inject my venom And he pours out his anger and his hurt Because I cannot return his honeyed words You don't understand These eight limbs of mine You don't understand These eight pitch black eyes I can't say I love you I hunt I hunger I feed
7.
reckless 03:40
He said I had the power to hypnotize him That my dark eyes took his senses away It was late at night and my wits were clouded And the rooks sat high on the otherwise open file And I moved my queen high, oh, such a reckless blunder He said I had the power to mesmerize him He said 'I flushed those benzodiazepines, I don't need them any more' It was late at night and my wits were clouded And the rooks sat high on the otherwise open file And I moved my queen high, oh, such a reckless blunder He said I had the power to mesmerize him He said 'I flushed those benzodiazepines, I don't need them any more'... I have you! I was such a fool and my mind was reckless And the rooks sat high on the otherwise open file And I moved my queen high, oh, such a reckless blunder And the rooks sat high on the otherwise open file And I moved my queen high, oh, such a reckless blunder
8.
He wants to know why I flinch to say I love you He wants to know why my warmth is forced and offered up on command He doesn't know how to navigate this place where hunger and madness collide He touches the silk of my web - he takes fright - he asks why You don't heed my words You close your eyes I do not love - I have eight limbs and eight eyes Lay still my dear while I inject my venom I am not yours - I have eight limbs and eight eyes He wants me to say that he's the only one He wants me to say I'll be his soft place to land for ever more Did he not see the black gloss of my jeweled exoskeleton He writhes in the snares of my web - he cries foul - he asks why You don't heed my words You close your eyes I do not love - I have eight limbs and eight eyes Lay still my dear while I inject my venom I am not yours - I have eight limbs and eight eyes

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released July 27, 2023

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